Tuesday, September 9, 2008

ADD at a Glance

No, this isn't going to be your typical ADD report; instead of blabbing on about chemicals and rapid neuron fire in the brain, or whatever have you, I am going to go by one of the steps to the scientific method (the cornerstone of science):

Observation.


Today, as I was placing a cake order for this family, I noticed several things; so, let's start from the beginning.

One of my managers was helping a guest with getting some bread for her, so I noticed some other guests who needed help. I go over, ask them if I could help them in any way, and they say they needed to order a cake. I promptly respond and grab the order sheet, and return and begin to ask them the questions on ordering the cake. I noticed that the Birthday-Boy-to-be was, shall we say, "energetic," to say the least. Yes, he was a little on the wild side, "ADD" as some may call it; but I am going to question whether or not that is a valid label for the boy.
I continue with my order, and they want this Lego cake. Now, by license laws, we cannot alter the cake in any way, such as: color, characters, shape, design, etc. If we were to, and we were auditted, we could lose our license. Anyway, moving on.
My manager comes over, and the parents (particularly the mom) are getting anxious about not being able to change the color of the trim (which makes up, like, 5% - if that - of the cake). She didn't like the red, because she (allegedly) worked in a bakery and red frosting just tasted "awful." She wanted it changed, and she was getting frustrate.
At this point, the boy said that he didn't mind the red frosting, that it was okay.
Mom? Ohhh, no. Totally and utterly unacceptable and she pretty much told the boy to shut up. (Now mind you, this boy is like 6 or 7.)
The kid energetically turns away and begins to admire the fake wedding cake that we display, with father carefully eyeing him out of his periferal vision.
Mom continues carrying on how stupid we are for not allowing the change in color; meanwhile, the boy takes some of the fake cake on his finger, and precedes to put it in his mouth. Dad and mom are in an uproar, almost as if they are imbarrassed by their kid.
Mom is still thinking about what to do with the cake, dad is yelling at boy, and boy is running around touching everything. I ask mom what she wants the cake to say, and she replies with sarcasm that it has to have the exact wording that is shown on the picture - but she was inconsistent and she chose to change the name of "Eric" (or whatever) to "______" (no, I am not going to tell you the kid's name :P). So not only did you show yourself as a tempermental person, but you allowed your son to see you treat someone who is trying to help you with disrespect. But this isn't about you mom (okay, indirectly is), it's about your boy.
Anyway, they go off nicely but clearly in a tiss. They didn't get the cake the way they wanted it, their child is having his ADD moment in an uproar, and you're only contributing to his uproar. Why? Let's go onto my conclusions.

Firstly, I would like to point out that I am not a firm believer in ADD. Do I think it exists? Yes. To the enormous extent that people say it does? No, I believe the term "ADD" is overused and a way - quite frankly - for parents to get their kids on drugs to shut them up. Little kids (especially 2 to 8 year olds) have a vast abundance of energy. Ever wonder why they are so skinny and don't gain much weight? Their metabolism is running at a very fast pace, a pace many people still wish they had. They are vibrant, little beings of energy - like a conduet of electricity in humanized form. Do kids need to tone it down, from time to time? Yes, that's the parent's job of making sure their child knows when to release the energy and when to quiet it up. Anyway, moving on.
Children are very interesting in the way they show their emotions. Many a time, they are blatant about how they feel: crying over spilled milk, saying that they don't like a person directly to that person's face, stealing a toy out of jealousy, etc., etc. But, when a child is not being treated right by a parent, say the parent is sarcastic to the child or the parent does not give the child as much attention as he may need (for instance, telling him to go play video games instead of taking a walk with him), the child will most certainly act out because that is all he knows how to do. I saw it very clearly today: Mom didn't like red icing, child said that it was fine, mom yells at child, child goes and starts eating foam.
The boy probably did not feel that his comment mattered, and/or that he was yelled at injustly (yes, kid's do have a sense of right and wrong).
The boy also later began touching everything that he could. Why did he do this? I think he wanted attention. Earlier he was made out to be someone who is insignificant, and this is his gosh damn birthday for crying out loud! If he wanted red icing, then give him red icing! But no, it was apparently gross-tasting and that would not be okay with the mother. Excuse me, but the cake isn't for you.
To me, the parents were putting unnecessary stress upon the boy, and aren't birthdays supposed to be stress-free?
Another observation I witnessed was when the family was looking at our sandwhiches over in the deli. Down at the bottom of one of the cases is a basket of oranges. The boy picks it up and asks, "Is this an orange?"
Dad looks over at him, "Smell it. Does it smell like an orange?"
Boy sniffs it and replies, "I don't know."
Of course the boy knew, he knew right from the beginning, but he chose to pretend he didn't know because he was acting out for some reason. Let's take a look at the father's response, "Does it smell like an orange?" (Please note that his tone was slightly angry/sarcastic.) Sure, the boy's question was stupid, but it was supposed to ascertain attention from the parents. Children only act out (from what I've seen) in one of three situations: 1. they are being rebellious, out of dissagreement with their parents; 2. something is physically wrong and/or bothering them; and 3. something is psychologically wrong and/or bothering them. Be aware that when I used the wording of "psychologically wrong," I meant "metaphysically," such as: emotion - they feel sad or got their feelings hurt by someone around them (friend, adult, family member, etc.); I did not mean it as if they were mentally ill, such as: insane, bipolar, and even ADD.
You can say that I am a huge "environmentalist" in that I believe the enviroment in which you are raised or live in has a huge impact on you as a person. If someone is being rude to us, or mean, we often will be rude/sarcastic back, spread rumors about that person, or we may even turn to physical violence. A child, on the other hand, will act out in ways trying to emulate his derision, but he just doesn't know how. (As I believe the case of the above said child was acting out.)

So, ADD a mental-chemical-illness? No; or at least, not 100% of the time. I believe it is just the energy of a six year-old combined with his not knowing how to handle the way he is treated, so he acts out and goes "crazy," if you will. I mean, y'all know that I am "ADD" and I change the subject way too much....





























-- Derek.


(Please note that this is my own observation and thought on the matter. There are many well educated people out there who have written books. How? I don't know...I'm ADD.)

:D

Friday, September 5, 2008

Labor- ah what the heck, "Memorial" Day.

For some odd reason, I kept calling it "Memorial Day." Can't figure out why....

Anyway, here are some pictures from LABOR Day. xD















































This picture wasn't taken on Labor Day, but I felt it deserved to be posted anyway: